this is first post by me on this blog

Journey till now……

April 2001, I entered this institute named MOUNT CARMEL SCHOOL. Well frankly never really wanted to enter there at that time. But I had no other option. Obviously it was difficult for a child of 6 to leave all his friends from the previous school in just a single day. Result-I was crying like anything else when I was asked by my parents to switch the school. All in all I would just say that this four building place was kinda hell for me. I am sorry for the raw words but its reality.

Now we come to the “opening day” of my life there. When I reached there I received a surely warm welcome by standing in the queue under the “lovely bright sun” for about half an hour which seemed to me like half a day. Behind me in the queue was a girl named Simran(name changed) who was probably or exactly, I don’t know, was only friend or rather I would say acquaintance I made that day. Moving on, after spending a really “SUNNY” half an hour we were allotted our classes. I forgot to mention that during all this time my mother was standing a little away from us and was the only comfort for me that day…….

Here come the classes oh! I am sorry; here comes the dull looking entrance to the K.G (which nowadays is very colorful). So this entrance vanished even the feeling of consolation which, though 0.1%, but was there. As said earlier, had no option so just proceeded onwards.

“U.K.G-D”, was printed in bold on a metal plate, hung beside a door which was actually the last one. I was to go in there so I went. Here I was very much consoled and in fact happy. Miss Promila Sharma, the lady who welcomed me in and the reason I was happy. I was instructed to call her ma’am and very innocently did it all the time.

Days went by; made many friends and was very happy under my class teacher’s motherly care and affection. One person I would like to mention here is a guy named Arun. My best pal, my homie, my amigo, my brother, whatever you like you can call. He was best part of my life. But now he hardly bothers what he meant to me. Moving on came final exams, cleared them all, was passed and moved on to next class.

By this time the school was no longer hell for me but still didn’t like it much. “Ist-D”, my new class. Was a little bit sad to leave my mother like ma’am but after all I was a child and the proverb out of sight, out of mind works very strongly for small buds. So same was my case. Here got a new “ma’am” named Miss Neelam. New class, new year, and of course new teachers. Again passed in flying colors and got 100 marks in math. Why my parents were so happy at that, I could never understand then. One more memory I have regarding my grade 1 is a teacher named Veronica. Still I feel like I never got a teacher like her. She was unique in her own way and I pray wherever she is today she is happy and blessed.

Another year went down the drain of life and I entered my new class, “IInd-A”.Miss Sakshi, my new mentor. Bubbly, cheerful, strict, such was my class teacher this year. Like this, years changed teachers changed I also grew up. In my seventh class, a new admission came. Though seemed nice to me but came to know later that I was wrong. He was a kind of bully or rather a complete bully. My problems started a year later in 8^th class when he tried to bully me and I never complied with him. When he couldn’t get me by power he resorted to other means. His group and he, they started spoiling my name in the eyes of the teachers. My, the then class teacher, Seema ma’am was the only one person to hear my plight rest all teachers just ignored me and rather took me for a spoilt child.

Was frustrated and this frustration needed an outlet, that I got in ninth. This year Shalini ma’am was my class teacher and she was new so no grudge for her was there. I won’t talk about my ninth much coz’ it was not a good year. I would just say that during that year I fought with almost every teacher which I obviously feel bad about now. I regret it now as later on I realized that if I had been at there place, I would have done the same or even worse. But as they say there’s no going back so I moved on. This year our class also went for a tour to Rajasthan. It was a life time experience for me. All the friends together, I enjoyed the journey more than the destination. This tour was a remarkable experience for me and will never forget it.

YYYYeeeaaahhhhh………..!!!!!!!, Came the golden time of my school life, my tenth class; the famous “X-A”. Got new friends or I would say best friends I have ever had till now. My class teacher, Miss. Nisha Mehta, was a teacher in perfect sense. On the very first day of our class she just said one thing which most of us followed till the end of the year. It was, “If you cooperate with me even in 25% of cases, I promise I will be by your side throughout the year.” It turned out to be true. Time moved on, we enjoyed every day of our school. The school which was a kind of hell for me turned into a second home but with first interest. I started to hate holidays. I wanted to be in the company of my friends each and every day. They became oxygen for me. Never thought that I would ever love my school sooooooooo muchhhhhh…………

This year I went through many ups and downs, made many mistakes, made many amends, lived my life in a real sense and throughout all this my buddies were always there beside me as a concrete support. This was also the year in which I got my lifetime buddies, “RITESH” and “DIKSHA”. They were always there for me, encouraging, when I was right, strict when I was wrong, and a dead stop for my every frown. They were, rather I would say, are the most important persons in my life. They are the only ones who are so close to my heart besides my parents and teachers. To them I would like to say, “Thanks for being there with me always. I will never forget you and what you have done for me. Sometimes it seems hard to believe that in this world can anyone get such good friends, but yes, It is true I have experienced it. So once again thanks for everything and please be there with me forever.”

 It was also the time when emotional changes usually start to show up. I was no different being, I also went through emotional changes, made the biggest mistake of my life and took a simple attraction as love……..I know it sounds kinda funny to some and may be offending to some but it’s the reality so let’s face it. But thank god, I realized soon that it’s nothing more than a simple attraction and was saved from a disaster. Thanks to my mother for that, I will be forever indebted to her for saving my future. Good thing-it’s over.

Coming to a close, the year end came and the only thing troubling me then was my performance in some subjects (although it was not a tension on my mind but was just a trouble that always existed only for few seconds). One more thing I would like to mention about my attitude towards study. I was like totally careless. Never gave a damn about what I was gonna do in final exams. My thinking-“let it be, there is still a day left for exam, a full day, will do it easily. Moreover full night is at my disposal……!!!!!” This  thing resulted in such a situation that by around 2 or 3 in night I would usually be done with less than half the syllabus and cursed myself but usually in such situations I was boosted by 2-3 text messages from my buddies that they are in same situation as I m. This was always more than enough for me to gather courage and sleep………..;) But I could never understand why I always knew 80%-90% answers even though I left more than half the syllabus. May be my attentiveness in class was the sole reason for this. I never prepared for pre boards and was very much non serious. But when the result came I was at 60% and was really shocked. This shock was probably the one regarding the studies which lasted the longest-for about half a day…….:P ;) A month later were boards, looking from across the space of a month with a very frightening snare for us and we, like ignorant birds ignored all the warnings of parents and teachers until we were just one day away from the “GRAND FINALE”. But then also we cared only for a moment and then forgot every tension. But I gave my boards on complete understanding basis and passed in flying colors and got 92%. I was very happy, my teachers and parents-proud. I was feeling contented as I made my parents and teachers proud. I miss those teachers, and those moments spent with them. Nisha ma’am, Anita Sood ma’am (English), Anita Sood ma’am (maths), Jaspal ma’am, Molly ma’am………….I miss you all a lot and especially the merry moments I spent under all of you. I just want to say to my teachers you are gems of my life and that too the most precious ones whom I can never afford to forget. You are the people who made me capable of everything I have achieved till date and for that I will always be thankful to you.

Writing with a very heavy heart, but………every thing was finished in a few days, whooossshhh…!!!!!!! Just went away and we couldn’t even notice when it was all over. We were still lost in memories when we realized that the buddies who were an essential part of each day and were essence of life will no longer be there every day to support us, to pick us up when we fell, to flick the dirt off our backs and encourage us not to give up. To forget all the essence of my life in just a few days was definitely a blow to me at least. Still my eyes become wet recalling all those crazy stupid things I did along with my buddies and how fast time passes when you are really happy from inside and believe me or not while I’m writing this my eyes are again damped remembering all those things again………….the gems of my life, miss them all, the school the class, ma’am, my friends, our pranks, our jokes, our fights, every moment that we spent together was a bliss and I’m sure these memories are gonna haunt my mind for eternity. As it goes, “Time is a galloping horse, a flowing river, a flying bird, blowing wind that stops at nothing and for no one. Time, whether good or bad, passes away but memories are the birds that live for eternity and haunt the minds, abandoned by time, as their nest.”

With March 2012, the golden time of my life ended. Was real sad about it never thought every thing would go away so quickly. But the very next day of my last board exam, I entered in a race, a race where people were running like mad to get on top. Where there were no friends, no life, no stupid things, not a even speck of craziness, no innocence, no nothing. The only thing mattered here was to be ahead of all. This race was the career race, or was just called so coz’ my thoughts then were,-“this is madness, what are they trying to do…..???? And what does they want from us….?????”. But before I could understand what was happening and what I should do, I also became a part of this race. I was transformed into a race horse from a carefree child.  After that it’s been two years and I never had time to look back and think about leaving the race. Race horse or not, I am gonna finish this race. It’s only in these two years I realized that a mad race or not, life is much more than it pretends to be.

 Friends, I would advise you that try to live life a little lightly while you still can. Be childish for later you will die to be but then you would have lost your chance. Open up your heart to every new day as if it’s the day you waited for all your life. Be a little carefree and just head out for horizons coz’ sky is not the limit beyond it lays a great, vast, endless universe that awaits you. Give chance to new things, forget the downs, enjoy the ups and care for those who care for you and to those, who stop believing when their belief is proven wrong, I would just say, give a chance to a new belief and a new trust and hold it strongly to your heart, fight for it, be firm for it, let it be your strength, then you will see what the power of a belief can do, I’m saying it coz’ I have experienced it through my friends and many other people close to me in my life. The only thing I have left to say after my tenth, which I think everyone says, is:-

“I always knew I would laugh over my cries. But never knew, will cry over my laughs”

My Batch mates ….as I saw them

Thirty years ago,…’Jab we Met'.....most of us were strangers. On our first day of the college we were marched into a bare looking dissection hall filled with pungent smell of formalin. Those of us who were familiar to each other tried to huddle together to get some comfort in this somewhat alien atmosphere –because you don’t get ‘Dead bodies’ as your table mates daily –however this was to be a routine affair here in after and those who lived on this earth not so long ago were to become our buddies for another year and a half. As we learned later, they were there to reveal the secrets about the beauty, which lay underneath the skin.

As we trudged along our path to shape our future, we made new friends. Harkanwal, Jaspreet, Rupinder, and Ajay Bagga were known earlier being fellow city and college mates. Kamaljit Rana, Parveen, Vipan, Jasbir, Malkiat, Manjit came together in hostel, Joshi came later. Each one of classmate was a gem in his/her own right. I don’t remember all – age has dimmed my memory to some extent. . Kamaljit Rana –a very dear and close friend –was a picture of indecisiveness; never able to take a decision, and never letting others know about what went on in his mind, because he himself never knew....!!!! He is still the same … letting others decide for him, nevertheless, a lovable guy, he loved to play guitar –however in room only- and had few romantic flings too! Vipan Goyal…. a great friend to have. Intelligent, studious, practical, competitive, and of course a great athlete, having a no- nonsense approach to life, loved challenges and had the guts to fulfil those –and believe me, he too had a romantic heart. Kirti will vouch for it.!… Samir Rai, his presence was all pervading..like ‘samir’ –the light breeze. A great mate – intelligent , well read- his room was well stocked with books (how many he really read and how many were to impress only I don’t know). Mostly a smile played across his face-at times mischievous one- but when angry his maroon face looked rather interesting , though a very rare occurrence – at least I don’t recall many .Samir in spite of his girth played tennis perfectly well and his mighty presence on court was enough to force opponent into submission-he threw his full weight(literally) behind every shot and oh boy ! how the ball rocketed past the net .About his classroom comments –the girls will know better because those were ‘well directed ’and mostly out of our earshot!

Gurmohan Sandhu – lovingly called ‘Goma,’tall and lanky and on the sports day he jumped higher and higher, defying gravity -and a new hero in high jumping was discovered. A shy and conservative person, took on the challenge of organising the re- union this time and I am sure will jump to a new high in hospitality. Another great athlete –Sudeep Singh, a tough man – superb sportsperson –the ‘wall’ of our cricket team, very competitive, great fighter and above all a great person. Damodar Chaterjee- simple and humble ,the marvellous percussionist from Tripura, , those unforgettable beats still reverbate somewhere deep in my heart-how his fingers danced on the Tabla creating a spell bounding synchronisation with the rhythm of life - a really mesmerising music…I hope he still plays Tabla.. Kiranjot Sodhi- the flutist –and great soothing singer. Then there was our diminutive fellow –BS Duggal- the master of the wit- had a great sense of raw and earthy humour , always ready with sharp ,crispy ,spicy and hot… ..I mean HOT.. jabs. Great friend , I miss him .This brings me to another of great mates – Harkanwal –popularly called ‘Chinna’ and “………’’ now whatever that meant .. ( I hope he will excuse me for this!) He was as energetic, witty and naughty, as he is today, a likeable prankster with great sense of humour and ever ready with suggestions and help.. and he played guitar too ! in early years , but later he stopped it – I don’t know why? this non ageing wonder from Hoshiarpur was and is a great source of moral support along with Jaspreet Dhami -the Jatt from Hoshiarpur –a careless, and easy going fellow , with devil may care attitude, another one who refuses to age .

Jasbir Jaswal – nick named ‘Boss’-- unfortunately had to fight a serious battle with a dreaded disease and underwent major surgery- due to which he fell behind us by one prof. – son of Army Major ,he was perfect to the ‘T’ in manners and etiquette. Bali, -again diminutive fellow but very intelligent , and great friend , Ravi Dutt – called ‘master ji’ as he taught many ,was exceptional in studies ,defied all the odds ,a fitness freak , very determined and came up in life the hard way –now a very successful paediatrician in Amritsar. Another Ravi -yes- Mahajan , introvert, sensitive ,hard worker and great human being. Rakesh Handa- well built , and stocky man-nick named ‘Doderlein bacilli… why so . ..Is another story? will tell some other time. Alok Joshi – joined us in 2^nd year - a dear pal - perhaps the first among our group to have an affair –a long lasting one and it is still going on stronger than ever …he married his sweet heart –Smriti. , I am happy that we contributed a bit in maturing the relationship. Parveen Dhingra – lovingly called ‘Doctor Sahib’ – simple and humble, a down to earth personality, very, very hard worker – a great source of inspiration –sometime used to get very formal – a great actor too – his acting prowess surprised many and he won a prize for that! A very fine human being – I love him . Anupam Sachdeva- a multi faceted personality, a key man in many scheme of things –the fund raiser for the most non academic events, endowed with brilliant mind, an asset for any batch and a go-getter –a party man –and the pivot of the forthcoming re union. Atul Arora- my doubles badminton partner –however we never progressed beyond first round – a unique personality, with springy gait, honest, with clear conscious, and butt of the many jokes but a great sport and a lovable guy. Ajay Gupta- dashing, handsome- a perfect bollywood material, I am surprised that he chose politics while another Ajay. Ajay Bagga, son of Hoshiarpur MLA –OP Bagga – did have great fascination for politics and is still very active socially& politically. Kamal Kishore- true Ambarsaria.. hailed from the walled city a great friend .Sukesh Bhatia – the topper , hard worker ,intelligent and a role model for those aspiring to reach the very top.

One very special person –who was always in hurry- living dangerously-wanted to finish off things as quickly as possible and sadly I never knew that he will finish off his worldly journey too so quickly –yes ,I am talking of Preeti … the man who left us at such a young age .Whenever he met me his face supported a broad grin – my prayers go out for him May God grant solace to his soul. This reminds of Avneesh , Rakesh Khanna and Manjit who also left us in prime of their youth – all very simple and humble guys- May God rest their souls in peace.

 

Then there was the other side of the fence –the world of glamour, a great divide existed between them and us. Few amongst us had the privilege to move across freely ,others like me were subject to selective osmosis –may be with rural back ground and being from conservative families we ourselves were a little hesitant and by the time things started falling into place –it was time to disperse. Anyway I do have some memories –albeit, dim ones ,so ladies ,oops!! Girls , excuse me if I am not so precise or even absolutely wrong. First to my mind comes –Kulveen , graceful, charming, carried an aura around her, and of course the nightingale of the class –she sang haunting melodies which still haunt many and Roohi- simple looking, thinly built, a slightly swaying gait, yet elegant, and mostly confined to herself, seemed studious type, and a type of a person who preferred to go along with the group. Stark contrast- Bharti, -a livewire of the class vivacious, bubbly, chirpy, full of energy and to the fore front always-a leader in her own right. While ,Deepti Chaddha – grace personified ,having beautiful ocean like eyes which seemed to be looking into distance ,perhaps searching something ,her sharp featured face , at times with slightly parted lips ,was an enigma in itself. –Overall simply beautiful. My city and pre medical college mate –Rupinder with her stern and headmistress like looks commanded respect, but down to earth personality with warm and compassionate heart and liked to enjoy life. Sadhna- sensous, sweet, and……., –the ultimate beauty who had many in trance. Evoked many aahs!! And oohs!! when passed by - a real head turner.

Anuradha, the dusky beauty, all-attentive in class, her head nodding briskly when in conversation , simple yet beautiful. I am sorry ,memory fails me about Navjot ..in spite of persistent scratching of my rapidly balding head ,I can’t place her.. My sincere apologies to her. I wonder how she managed to slip out of my fading memories, must be a slippery customer! Kusum. Energetic, dynamic. had special interest in epidemiological study of ..’malaria’ …and its vector!!! Sita Sharma graceful, had a next-door girl image with studious looks, further enhanced by the big sqaurish glasses she wore. Anupama and Virinder – important to mention them both together as perhaps they are the only one amongst us who finally made it--- ‘ to the perfect union’… many others remained like the banks of a river coming close at times. but never meeting ..dreams shattered ..hearts aching ,egos bruised…or there were none, may be I am just imagining.

That was the type of my batch- a curious mix of multitude of personalities in all sizes and shapes-intelligent, mischievious, romantic fools, beautiful and handsome. It was a complete batch – with celebrities, commoners, and the in between ones. My heart swells with pride, when I find that I was a member of this great batch—Batch 78-82 GMC Amritsar.

Enough! Folks I think I have bored you to the hilt with my musings, list is not complete though. Again I will say these are my perceptions, written with malice towards none, please take these sportingly.

                                                                                                          -Dr. Rajender Sharma

Platform No 12 

The cold hard concrete bench was not very comfortable but I had no other  better choice than this to spend few hours of early December night there along with my wife Anita, as the train to Ajmer Sharif was late by two hours and we had almost four hours to kill.  We were on a visit to Pushkar Raj near Ajmer Sharif in Rajasthan to perform certain religious rites on the occasion of my father’s first death anniversary and were waiting on the Platform No 12 of the old Delhi railway station.

Atmosphere in AC waiting room was uncomfortably aloof and stuffy , soon we got bored and moved to the   sleeper class waiting room  but it was  over crowded  with  people sprawling across its paan stained floor and benches , so we finally decided to settle  on the platform benches –there was at least fresh air and it was alive and full of activity ,some people  passing their time like us ,others rushing to catch the train , while others munching happily at  the food items they could lay their hands upon and some lazing around  on bed sheets spread on the floor. It was really a fascinating scene .There were young, old and not so old vying for space on the platform, some had a resigned look on their faces – perhaps they had lost hope of their train ever coming! while others excitedly waiting for the impending arrival of their train.

One Sadhu Baba sitting in a corner was least bothered about the mad rush around him ,he was watching the happenings with bemused eyes and it seemed that the platform was his permanent night shelter.  I  looked behind me and thought of shooing away the  dog who was  trying to share the old tattered blanket of a malnourished  lady sleeping near the pillar but then deciding against it  , I got up to explore the station and get something to keep me warm and awake . McDonalds, tucked away in one corner provided me coffee and I loitered around gazing at the giant information display board hoping to see the name of my train being flashed but was disappointed.  

People were moving around me  oblivious of my presence – how small and humble one feels in such places  ,almost negligible, nobody is bothered about you , you are  all alone  even in middle of   the sea  of humanity ,so many people around you yet alone and insecure….. Flashing signs, brightly lit stalls, loads of luggage stacked here and there and people rushing across, all too familiar but still looks too alien. How our mind works- it is a puzzle to me , how we make cocoons around us , isolating ourselves and trying to shut off ourselves from the people around us. Still you desperately look for some solace around but none is to be found.

I wandered back to my bench to the comfort of a little place which I thought was mine  and more so because Anita  was  there , it was like home coming . The coffee I had brought for her had gone cold – perhaps my musings had gone a little too long. To avoid her disapproving looks I turned around and saw that the dog was by now almost half inside the sleeping lady’s blanket and both were fast asleep may be feeling more secure in each other’s presence and no longer afraid of the crowds milling around them.

“Attention please… ting …tong… ting.”- a crisp announcement about the  arrival of another  train brought me back to the reality  and  my wrist watch told me that still one and half  an hour was more to be spent . It was time to cheer up my wife ,so I  went to a fast food kiosk nearby . While I was browsing through  the  menu display board , a  man in dirty worn out   clothes ,with a impoverished look begged for some food in barely audible voice , and was immediately rebuked by the sales person manning the counter.Sunken eyes ,haggard look ,  cracked lips and shriveled skinny trembling  hand imploring for food were enough to tell that man might not have eaten for long.  Life can be so demeaning sometimes –it almost seems to be guilt to be alive. … Why it happens? They who are wise, say it is one’s karma. .. the fruit of the one’s past life. But who knows …? Why doesn’t God give the punishment of one’s deeds in the same life? Why one has to carry the baggage to another life – and then one doesn’t remember it too .This is unfair. If punishment has to be given then one must know the crime also. Then only we won’t commit the sins. But God doesn’t like it that way. He wants us to commit sins so that  He can punish. These are the little games He plays with all of us. He enjoys it and that’s why we are mere toys in His hands. That is what the wise men and the saints call the ‘’Maya Jaal ’’ of the God. He is the Master Puppeteer and we the mere puppets in His hands.

“ What do you want ,Sir?” … the  business like inquiring voice of the  man at the sales counter  brought me back to the cacophony of the Platform No 12. “One combo veggie meal”, I managed to speak out with dry throat, “ please make it two”, I almost stammered, as my eye caught the man in tatters… looking at me with distant looking expression less eyes. Perhaps emotions, feelings, pains, hurt, egos...  had  left him long ago...and he no longer felt the need for these nice little appendages of human life!

 

I walked back to my bench, determined this time not to let any thought come in between hot meal and my wife. I triumphantly handed to her the neatly packaged food tray and sat with her to enjoy the still warm and tasty rice and daal  meal .  Another family sitting on the next bench was coming back to life and Anita –who had in the meantime befriended them -told me that that their train was just about to come. After spending more than 10 hours on the platform, they were getting ready to spend another full day on the wheels running on the iron tracks.  Well the excitement on their faces gave me encouragement and I settled as comfortably as I could, to pass another hour.

Just in front of our bench a couple -with six children of about 2 years old to 10-12 year old, had been camping for some time.  They had about 10 different sized bags of all sorts, small, medium and large ones. I wondered how they both will manage with so much luggage and six kids .Soon I was provided with answer – as I looked with   admiration at their management skill – each child except the youngest one picked up the bag according to his age and size and the eldest one picked the youngest child along with his own bag,  both husband and wife picked the remaining bags and it was time to move on,…off they went to board the waiting train , no fuss, no confusion, very cool …everyone knew exactly what to do, and I understood why the bags were of different sizes.

How life teaches you to manage – no management school can do so – yes life is a great teacher. Experience is the wisdom you gather while negotiating the bumpy curves of the path you travel and this travel is life – some times sweet & joyful, some times sour and painful, depressing at times and exhilarating at others, life is a drama to be played and after playing our role we will make way for others. This is a endless circle going on since times unknown and will go on for times unknown .Realizing this, that I have to move to the next scene in the drama of life, I took off again to have a look on the giant display board and it informed me that Haridwar – Ahmadabad Express – the train we were to board -was arriving in half one hour. I felt a surge of excitement – now I understood why the faces of passengers light up on coming to know that their wait is going to be over shortly.

Platform No 12 was still abuzz with activity even now when the long arm of the   giant clock hung on one wall was inching towards the smaller one to meet it. It was soon going to be midnight and a moment later –the moment which will be the witness to the change -  a new day will begin. Just as a new life begins after one life ends -- like a scene in a drama. But the mad rush will continue in the same way. People from all walks of life, from almost all regions of the country , foreigners , some rich and famous , some poor and destitute , some grieving and some celebrating, some hungry looking for left overs , some well fed, but  cribbing about the  lack  of quality and variety of food items, will be keeping the place alive , full of life , and it seems that this ‘mini India’  the Platform No 12 , will never sleep  the drama of life will  continue to be played , only the actors will change.

My train had just screeched to halt and it was time for me and Anita to move on leaving the little cozy place on the bench behind….. very much behind. But the memories of the Platform No 12 will linger for long…............

                                                                                                                         -Dr. Rajender Sharma

When I saw death

 

 

Dear friends, I am going to share with you my chilling personal experience, which happened few years back , 19th June 2009 to be exact.

 I along with my family decided that summer to go for "Shri Amarnath ji Yatra". It has been my long cherished desire to have a "Darshan" of naturally formed Ice Shiv Lingam at "Shri Amarnath Ji" in Kashmir .Due to heavy rush we couldn’t get Air tickets and decided to make journey on ponies from base camp Baltal to the Holy cave- a distance of about 15 kms. But we had hardly gone for about 6 kms when we decided to leave the ponies and continue the trek on foot as the ponies were not very stable due to the slippery and narrow track and I almost fell down once. However with "Bhole Baba’s" (Lord Shiva's) grace we reached the Holy Cave and had a great "Darshan" of the ice Shiv Lingam – a rare sight and it filled my mind with peace and tranquilly. At that moment it started snowing and we decided to come back before the weather turned more nasty. On the way back due to the bad weather and rush of devotees we were caught in a jam on a slippery and muddy track with almost a foot deep slush and mud. Rain intensified and we were thoroughly soaked in spite of the raincoats. Kids were feeling the ill effects of cold and we were not able to move at all due to the jam and to make things worse, it became dark –the night had descended. My younger daughter was shivering uncontrollably. I gave her my woolen cap and gloves as additional protection. Some how with help of few good "Samartians" we were able to descend  the track and reached the place called "Sangam". There was a small tea shop which was already occupied fully and there were no other relief camps there and it was still raining and time was about 9 pm. Temperature had almost fell down to sub-zero We had to move on as we couldn’t have stayed there all night in the open and with the help and support of the same young boys who helped us earlier we started the next journey—but it was a uphill climb now at the gradient of almost 30 degree. The slippery track and heavy rain made it very difficult. We managed to climb about 500 meters then we could move no further as the track became very slippery slushy and dangerous. We all – 5 of us and 5 of our support party led by one "Sumit Sagar" from Delhi, sat there and waited for the rain to stop. But it was not to be- rain continued along with sleet and we felt our hands and feet going numb. Kids –who were earlier complaining of cold, were now not even whimpering-and that was not a good sign. It was very scary. Our support party leader Sumit told me that we can’t move further as the track beyond that is more difficult and we will not be able to negotiate it in this weather and neither can be go back to Sangam till the rain stops and take shelter in BSF camps. It was then that the deadly reality struck me  – that we were caught in very dangerous and hopeless situation and any thing. I mean anything could have happened. All depended on stopping of the rain. Till then we were stuck there ..Meanwhile condition of the kids became worse and even my wife was almost …on the verge of collapse…kids were not even responding..I lost all hope .. and for once I saw Death ...so nearby.. I made my final prayers "WHEN I SAW DEATH" …!!. As a last try I requested Sumit to take us down at any cost .. he himself –although a very experienced and adept trekker was shaky and told me to wait till rain stops.. I said to him it may be too late then --as  we had no other option -we took a deep breath prayed to the God and made a human chain of ten people and slowly and slowly inched our way to Sangam. We almost slithered on our backs ..fearing every second that one wrong step and we will be in rushing waters of nullah flowing below . At last we reached down .. and requested the BSF people to give shelter at least to kids and my wife. To our good luck the officer on duty was very considerate and immediately took them inside their kitchen, gave them blankets and gave a special care to my son –who was almost loosing consciousness. They warmed him with kerosene fired heaters and wrapped him in special quilts..  I was accommodated in the sentry post along with 7-8 other people, which also had kerosene heater to keep us warm. I spent the whole night standing there – but due to the timely help by BSF people, my and my family’s life was saved. My wife and myself just lost our great toenails and had few blisters and chill blains on feet – but then that is a small price to pay for our lives. I once again Salute the BSF personnel and  Sumit Sagar and his friends – "Kalu , Rishu , Vicky" and 5th unnamed – who were like God sent ambassadors – who really saved us before the BSF people took over .. A BIG THANKS TO ALL OF THEM  and the Almighty God – without whose wish nothing is possible

I also owe this to the best wishes of all of you. .

 I will remember this Yatra throughout my life.

                                                                                                     - Dr. Rajender Sharma